Wednesday, March 22, 2006

New Word and a couple other thoughts....

Let's start today with New Word Wednesday
Today's word is obnubilate which is a verb that means to becloud, obscure. Again, here is what my little calendar says: The meaning of obnubilate becomes clearer when you know that its ancestors are the Latin terms ob-(meaning "in the way") and nubes ("cloud"). They go on to say that the word is often used in connection with politics and politicians...go figure.
Here, today, my mountains are completely obnubilated. We had a little snowfall last night and today it is just grey and gloomy. Frankly, if it's going to be grey I'd just as soon have snow. Hopefully the cloud cover will dissipate and we'll be back to sunshine this afternoon.
Yesterday's second act at the dentist was uneventful, as was the quick trip to the store on the way home. I finished the increases on the sleeve and I think I will knit another pattern repeat and then put the sleeve on a stitch holder until I get a better idea of how far the drop shoulder 'drops.' I don't think my short little arms need 20 inch sleeves. I have to admit, even though I really don't like to knit sleeves, the pattern keeps it interesting and it is easier to see the progress than on the body, where it takes me 10 minutes to do one row.
If you haven't read it yet, you really should read the March 20 post by the Yarn Harlot. Any of you who have raised teenagers will certainly identify with Steph's prose. Any of you who are teenagers will be enlightened as to what we as parents feel on a daily basis. It prompted me to leave a comment about my own experiences, now having (chronologically) adult children. It has also created an internal dialogue regarding what I should and should not---can and can not---say in this forum. While I do not have the following of the harlot, someone somewhere may stumble across this blog and think me inappropriate. Perhaps, years from now I may have several readers who then go back and read everything I've written (as I did when I discovered Yarn Harlot). Conversely, this is, as I say in the header, my ramblings about "knitting, reading and living life." (I'm overthinking this right??)
The comment I shared with Stephanie is this: that raising kids is a crapshoot. I've recently shared the analogy that while I feel like I spent my life planting corn, I now find that I'm harvesting peas. While I like peas, they are not what I planted nor what I expected. I may or may not see corn later, learning to appreciate everything about peas has become my challenge.
I was really beating myself up over the decisions my grown sons were making when it suddenly came to me that I had been successful in that I had raised young men who could and did think for themselves; they have their own opinions, their own thoughts and philosophies on life, they question things, don't do things just because "it's what we've always done" or "it's the way Mom or Dad always did it." They are their own men, and this is a good thing regardless of whether I agree with their decisions.
I also realize with a new clarity, that my job as a parent has changed; I am no longer she "who must be obeyed" but have become a friend--- and advisor when asked. It's a tough balance. I'm not sure I have it down yet. I'm not sure I'll ever have it perfect, and I said as much to son number one the other day. I refuse to be the kind of parent who is manipulative and uses guilt as a motivator, yet there are times when it is still a huge temptation. I'm sure it will take time to find my feet in this rather new role. I guess you can say my role is somewhat obnubilated.
Well, that's enough random ramblings for one day I think.
If anybody is out there (?) I'm looking for feedback on a couple things: where best to throw my birthday $$ AND what colors to put with the nutmeg colored Dale yarn for a Fair Isle.


At 3/22/2006 11:43:00 AM, Blogger margene said...

They saying being a parent of adults is knowing when to keep your mouth shut. You are doing and did do a great job.

At 3/22/2006 12:27:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I also read yarn harlot yesterday and thought her anology was wonderful...I can guarntee that I ain't there yet...I pray that I will be there someday...I just want to be the best mom that I can be. :)M

At 3/25/2006 08:02:00 AM, Anonymous Lisa H. said...

I just discovered your blog via Margene's meme and had to comment on this post. I am the mother of two youngsters (3 and 1) and the step-mother of a 15 year old. I loved Yarn Harlot's post about parenthood and your comments, as well. It's a topic I think about often and completely agree that it's so important to raise our children to become independent adults. I hope I have the guts to do it.


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